The Apprentice-like Semester

RESPONSIBILITY - I have plenty of it on my plate this semester, especially the weeks leading up to the prelim exams. Where do I even start in listing those responsibilities when I have so much?

I'll just start with the biggest and longest one: being the Editor-in-chief/group leader for our newsletter publication for Journalism class. I'm guessing my group mates chose me to be the leader because of my experiences as a campus journalist, though I've never actually gone as far as being the EIC. Also, they probably think that I can do it, so it is up to me to not let them down.

My responsibilities include collecting funds for getting our materials printed, assigning tasks, editing materials, and making sure every member on my staff in The Catalyst does her job.

The idea of naming our publication The Catalyst came when I was thinking of something cool and creative Linkin Park has come with. I ended up with the simplest of their song titles. And although I thought of calling our publication "Iridescence" - derived from the band's song "Iridescent" - I didn't want any issue with pronunciation.

This is a responsibility tagged on me for an entire semester. Thankfully, I have members I know I can rely on to step up.

While I'm on the topic of being a leader of a group for an entire semester, I found myself being the head of a four-member group for my English for Specific Purposes class. This one I'm not too happy about because this class is one that I, frankly, do not like, with its implications that it'll helpful if I become a teacher. Bah, humbug!

My other upcoming responsibilities include attending events for our university's foundation day (for "journalistic" purposes), writing an article for Gasera, working on requirements, and writing for personal project.

This is a lot more than I can normally handle, but maybe this is m chance to do some growing up... you know, that whole being mature and stuff. I know that I have A LOT of growing up to do, and sometimes I refuse to, like I'm Holden Caulfield or something. But the time has come to become a responsible adult, and I better seize the chance.

Finding Writer's Digest - It's a Sign

Whenever I flip through the magazine stocks at Book Sale in SM, I don't usually find anything I like. (Okay, so I do find magazines where some of my favorites actors or actresses are on the cover, but I don't go ahead and buy the magazines because I don't usually need them.) Yesterday, however, all the minutes of magazine-flipping paid off when I saw two magazines titled WRITER'S DIGEST. My thoughts when I saw the magazines: SCORE!

And seeing these magazines was a good thing. For some time I've been experiencing some self-doubt or anxiety mixed with strong hope and determination - an ambivalence, really - towards my chances of making it as a writer. Some of my instructors sneer and tell us we're (our class) not a certain level for us to consider ourself English majors. I try to fight off the negativity, but it just keeps coming, trying to masticate me in the gluteus.

One of the issues of the magazines I bought is particularly helpful - it's filled with tips on style, improvement, beating writer's block, etc. On the other hand, the other issue focuses on how to get your memoir published.

With these materials in hand, I hope to truly stay on track with my writing. I'm not going to let situations, bordering-on-bully instructors, and myself waver my spirits. Thought right now I have no idea how I am going to get where I need to be, I have faith that things will fall into place, thereby giving me opportunities to make things happen for me.

Dobby is FREE

One of the characters who die in Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows is Dobby the house elf. The Harry Potter audience was first introduced to the lovable elf during the second installment of the series, The Chamber of Secrets. He was still the house elf - more like slave - of the Malfoy family. And though this may be the predicament Dobby is in, he believed in what is right by warning Harry of the dangers he may find himself in if he goes back to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy in his second year. It was a risky move, nevertheless, Dobby was only doing what he can do to save a life.

By the end of Chamer of Secrets, Dobby is already a free elf, thanks to harry. From there after, Dobby is forever grateful for Harry's act of kindness.

During the 5 years  Dobby was a free elf, he would now and then turn up to be of help to the young man who gave him freedom. In the film version of Deathly Hallows, we see that Dobby is making the most out of his freedom, even wearing a pair of sneakers (or trainers), as one can see by looking closely at the photo below.

He helped save lives, and if in doing so he lost his own, I say that Dobby had not died in vain. Had he not shown up at Malfoy manor, grave things could have happened and we could have seen the end of Harry, Ron, and Hermione. So I believe that Dobby died a hero.

And I admit, I did get a bit teary-eyed when I watched his death in the film. He was such an adorable little creature and he was killed by a crazy bitch witch in the form of Bellatrix Lestrange.

One may also notice how different Dobby looks in Deathly Hallows. He looks better than he did in Chamber of Secrets. In Deathly Hallows, he looks realistic and almost tangible. Maybe it's the result of how much CGI technology progressed over the years. Or maybe the change in Dobby's appearance can be looked at symbolically: the freedom Dobby enjoyed for five years had an effect on his appearance. He was no longer distraught or punished for missteps he makes as a house elf. He was a happy elf and that showed.

When Dobby died, he definitely died in peace. He did a heroic act before he died by saving Harry Potter and his friends. 

Dobby said it best: "Dobby has  no master! Dobby is a free elf, and Dobby has come to save Harry Potter and his friends!"

From there, Dobby definitely became free.

The End of a Journey... Begins (a review on Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 1)

'The Boy Who Lived' remains a symbol for each we are fighting for: the triumph of good, the power of innocence, and the need to keep fighting.

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows is not like any other Harry Potter films the world has seen. It's the climax of the ultimate battle between good and evil in the wizarding world. With his mentor and possibly the greatest wizard of all Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter must seek the remaining Horcruxes and destroy them in order to defeat Lord Voldemort once and for all. But nowhere is safe. With Voldemort and his Death Eeathers taking over the Ministry of Magic and Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, nowhere is safe for Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

As a literature major, I was able to appreciate the film's emotional intensity by trying to put myself in the characters' situations. This is what is called "vicarious experience". I felt the pain of Hermione as she was about to leave her family in order to join Harry and Ron in their quest. I felt Ron's frustration and worry towards his family's safety as their chances of finding the rest of the Horcruxes are as good as finding a needle in the haystack. I also felt Harry's lifelong loneliness of not having parents. I never experienced any of Hermione's, Ron's, and Harrry's experiences, but the presentation in the film was so good that I was forced to empathize.

On the other hand, I was sort of able to relate to some scenes, like when Ron's deepest, darkest insecurities taunted him right before he was about to stab the horcrux with the sword of Gryffindor. I also saw a little bit of my personal life during the Ron/Hermione moments. However, if I were to elaborate on these things, I'd do it in another writing.

The mood of the film was, for the majority of it, serious. Deaths occur and the trio have nowhere to go to and no one to turn to without risking that person's life. However, the film has its humor, which is good because if the movie didn't have any humor then it would've been a boring movie. Besides, the humor and the scene where Harry and Hermione share a dance show that at even the darkest of times, one can still choose to be happy.

While I give the film a 9 out of 10, I wish there were some things in the film that should have been elaborated. For instance, the character of the Dursleys didn't come full circle. There was no change from being people who looked at Harry as a waste of space to someone they actually care about. It would've been great if the film showed this change in Dursleys, just saying.

Furthermore, I wish the film had presented more background story of Kreacher and why he comes off as bile and oftentimes mean. If only we had seen what truly happened with Regulus Black and Kreacher when they sought to take the horcrux, then the outcome would've given audiences a better understanding of Kreacher as a character.

If these things had been done, then Deathly Hallows would've been the perfect movie. But then again, as we all know, nothing is perfect.

Part one of Deathly Hallows is done and now we have to wait eight months to get through before THE final Potter movie comes out. The question is: are true-blooded Harry Potter fans ready for the end?

Credit go to the following for the images used in this post:

Love Unchained

Everything Harry Potter

Umbridge Strikes Back! (And no, I'm not referring to THE Umbridge)

Life can be strange sometimes. For a moment, it presents you with a problem that you feel you can not conquer, and all you can feel is doom and dread. But then, surprisingly, that problem is lifted off your shoulder and you feel as if you're free for good.

Oh, no. Life's little third act twists come into play and bring back the problem you thought you've gotten rid off.

This is the case when one of SOH's most infamous instructors - let's call her "Dolores Umbridge" - became my instructor in one of my major subjects. I used the word "infamous" because she is known to be as a certain  majors' worst nightmare (I'd like to specify what department of School of Humanities that is, but I would like to keep that one under the rug in case anybody accuses me of anything). She comes across as mean, especially since she is known for humiliating her students in class. Some also say that when things get personal between her and a student, she fails any student who would dare defy her. If what I mentioned make a person a bully, then, yes, I consider her as a bully.

The moment she entered the classroom during the first meeting, dread filled every student in the room. It was like a Dementor entered the room and as though all the happiness in the world was gone. "Why her?" could've crossed a student's mind. As for me, though I did feel the dread, I eventually just told myself to accept the situation for what it was: a challenge to overcome. I tried to keep a strong spirit, but eventually I realized that I don't believe in using intimidation in order to make a student learn. To me, it felt like this instructor had to be respected because she's feared. I'm sorry, but I believe that there must be kindness in teaching. Even if I was only under her class for a few a day, I hardly saw a speck of kindness in her personality.

Fortunately, it turned out that she was only a temporary instructor for that subject. The class was euphoric upon hearing that.

But the celebratory mood was short-lived when we learned she was going to be our permanent instructor in another major subject. Oh, crap, "Dolores Umbridge" is back.

I for one am not so happy at this news. I thought we were all free from "Dolores Umbridge". Then again, maybe this is a challenge I'm just going to have to face. I once read a quote that says "When life puts you in tough situations, don't say 'why me?' Just say 'try me.'"

Well, you know what? In the words of Barney Stinson: CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

And come to think of it, "Dolores Umbridge" isn't the only mean-spirited person I will meet in my life. I mean, what if I end up having a boss who is just like "Dolores Umbridge"? So I might as well get used to facing "superiors from hell" and know that at the end of it all, I'm going to be all right.

The Bully, The Bullied, and The Bystander

Bullying is a growing social problem that needs to be addressed, and more importantly, stopped. Although it's a been around for as long as anyone can remember, it's only when the tragic deaths of a few gay teens that made headlines in the US did people start taking the situation seriously. It took tragedy for the world to truly notice what bullying can lead to.

I myself have been bullied as a kid. During first grade there was this one girl who would always make me cry in class. Here I am, 12 years later, and I can't really remember why she bullied me. I don't think I ever purposely did anything mean to her that would make her hate me. She probably didn't like me even if I was just being myself. There was even a time she punched me in the face. Literally. I didn't even do anything to her - I never humiliated her, took anything from her, or intentionally hurt her. I was the quiet, new kid in class who may have come off as "strange" because I didn't go about the way the other did. I never talked smack about anyone. And I was kind enough to lend my things to some of my classmates, but they would either not give it back or if they do give it back, my things would be in poor condition. (Keep in mind, we were all first graders.)

Most of the time I didn't feel accepted or liked. I didn't have people to hang out with long enough for me to consider them my friends. As early as seven years old I was already made to feel like an outcast. There were event times when I didn't want to go to school so that I wouldn't have to face my oppressors.

So the following school year my parents transferred me to a different school. From there, things started getting easier. But, at first, things were slightly tough for me. During the first few days I didn't feel so welcome, but eventually I found friends, some of whom I still keep in touch with.

You might be wondering: since I was bullied, did I ever bully another student? In retrospect, I did. But I wasn't the kind who would steal lunch money or push kids around. I did call names, though, like "freak" or "loser" and once made a girl cry. These count as thing in life that I am not proud of. I was young and a but ignorant. Now that I am older and know better, I do not encourage kids who were once bullied to become bullies themselves. Bullying another person is not the way to move and forget the hell you've been through.

In the paradigm of bullying, there are three sets of people involved: the bullied, the bully, and the bystander. I've been the bullied for a year, the bully on few occasions, and of course,the bystander for as long as I can remember.

Bystanders are those who just stand and watch - either in indifference or out of fear - as a bully makes someone's life a living hell. They don't gather the courage to tell a bully to stop or come to the aid of the bullied when he or she feels miserable. Bystanders usually don't care or maybe they do, but their train of thought says "It's none of my business anyway."

As much as I'd love to encourage bystanders to stand up against bullies, I believe that I do not have the credibility to do so. I would be a hypocrite of I myself turn a blind eye when a bully is on a rampage.

What I will encourage, though, is kindness. No matter how different your peer is from you - whether in terms of race/ethnicity, gender, sexual preference, faith, economic status, or whatever - they deserve to be treated with kindness and love.

People have wasted too much time focusing on how they differ instead of seeing how they are alike and what they have in common: the ability to love. And I believe that now, more than ever, we should work on that ability.

The "After Graduation" Formulation

Read every book in my personal library.

That's something you don't hear very often when asking a college student what he or she plans to do after graduation. In my case, that's what I see myself doing, at least for some time.

After I graduate, I want to take some time off to try to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life. Writing is amazing, but as of late, I need a back-up plan. So, after graduation from college, I'll do some writing that will hopefully be published next time, write some articles for a company maybe (I'll work from home, perhaps), and most of all, take some time to read the books I have shelved in my library.

College is four years of assignments, tests, lectures, unpredictable instructors, term papers, etc. and sometimes it's difficult finding time for yourself. When I graduate I'll go out to do things that I dream of doing while I still have the energy to do them.

I want to avoid becoming one of those people who work and work, but never find the time to enjoy the fruits of their labor.

Maybe this is my Road Not Taken. Maybe this is how my life is supposed to turn out. But if things will have to go my way, then I'll make everything I said happen.

Let's Get Physical

There's a buzz going around our class about going to the gym. Now, I don't really know if I should be joining in on that bandwagon. 

Then again, I really want to give this whole gym thing a try, out of my need to attain the kind of body that I desire.

I look at people like Heather Morris or Aly Michalka and instantly, I want their toned arms and rock-hard abs. I probably seem vain by admitting that I want to go to the gym just so m body would fit my idea of a perfect body. That is a little true.

But another reason I have for wanting to go through this "gym bandwagon" is my want - and need - to stay fit. In all honesty, this is only secondary reason. 

There are things holding me back, though. First of all, the money I would spend is not money I personally earn. I know that money in this family is a little tight, even if my parents don't say it. So, I wouldn't want to casually spend their money when fact of the matter is, it can be spent on more things. And wouldn't it be more fulfilling if the money I spend in paying for gym services is money I earned? When I do start earning my own dough, then I can probably start spending them on things I want for myself.

Secondly, there's an issue with time. I'm not exactly the Michael Phelps or LeBron James of Time Management, but how do I squeeze in time for the gym between school, eating, reading, sleeping, writing, and slacking off now and then?

Maybe time and money wouldn't be a big deal. I'll probably do this whole gym thing and in doing so, it's a win-win situation: I get the body of my deepest desires and I get to spend time with some friends while I'm at it.

So here's what you missed...

(Imagine that voice over guy from Glee while reading this blog)

The first week of second semester, and though it's only been three days, I'm already feeling haggard. First of all, the "legendary" Ms. Castro is my instructor in Enlg15b (Editing, Copyreading, and News Production) and I swear, almost everybody in class is watching his or her every step (including me). She's known for being a source of fear intimidation among students from the School of Humanities, especially Mass Communication students. I can sort of see why they fear her, but I think I can handle her. Wish me luck on that.

Also, American Literature class, like English Literature, demands in me a great deal of knowing a lot about the history of USA. Darn, there's so much reading for me to do that I'm quite surprised I don't wear spectacles yet.

Then there's Drama class (which doesn't really demand any acting skill, rather analytical skills) wherein I think I'll have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome from all the lecture. Our instructor, Sir Laoyan, is known for his lengthy notes-giving... that are dictated. I'll probably need another notebook before the semester is even over. 

With all these reading and whatnot for all of my classes, I'm going to have to do a lot of consulting over at SparkNotes and printing/photocopying of notes. Thank goodness for the boom of the internet as a source of academics, otherwise I'd probably be attached to another object by an inclined plane, wrapped helically around an axis (something I picked up from The Big Bang Theory). In other words, I'd be screwed.

Anyway, there are also a bunch of other things going on, but I'm just going to have to put them in other blog posts.

PS: It's a weekend, yet I'm online copying Spark Notes analyses on our assigned readings for Drama class.

Lost in a Symbol

Today's a fine Monday on the first day of November. The weather is not intolerably hot nor is it cold enough to make you feel sleepy. Yet, I actually still feel sleepy despite the eight hours of sleep I had last night. My sleepiness is brought on by my late night reading of the novel The Lost Symbol.

I am a fan of Dan Brown's writing, as proven by my good impression of his latest work. Symbols, suspense, mysticism, history, etc. all come together in this compelling novel. It's one of those books I don't want to put down but would have to because there are other things that I need to attend to.

But I guess that my want to read more and more of the book is a good thing. It means that the book was so well-written that I could not get enough of it.

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